It was one year ago this month that we lost two ladies from this congregation to cancer. Robin Mortimer died on the 18th, Laurie Link died on the 28th. The one was 46, the other 54. While I hate to lose anyone to death, I took those two deaths particularly hard. I considered both women personal friends. As their pastor, I spent quite some time at their bedsides during their ordeals. Then too, this church poured a good amount of prayer into both situations. We had even joined together as a congregation and leadership to pray for them during a service in January of last year. That was a very special and moving moment. One we share as a congregation; one I shall not soon forget. Nonetheless, both Robin and Laurie died. Almost instantly, those two deaths led to the loss of better than a half-dozen people from this fellowship. That only added to my sense of loss.
Finally, It was only a month later that my wife Marilyn was found to have cancer as well. Again those two ladies died of cancer and now my own wife had cancer. You talk about scary! The following month my mother died and within another six months, my brother-in-law died of cancer and a week after that my mother-in-law died. There were other issues during that time that I had to contend with as well that were not death related. In short, the last twelve months have been maybe the most difficult twelve months of my life.
Back, now, to the deaths of those two women. According to my way of thinking:
- The Lord was supposed to heal the two of them. He didn’t.
- Then too, in my estimation, they were frankly too young to die. They had not gotten their allotted 70 years in. Yes, I understand that “it is appointed unto man once to die”, but not in the prime of life.
- I thought that me and God had worked a deal. I would pastor the church; He would protect the church. The elders would pray for the sick; the Lord would raise them up.
In truth, I have grieved over those two deaths for nearly a year. I asked God why? I really wanted some answers, not only for myself, but for you. As a pastor, I felt that I
needed to know what to say in the face of other such deaths in the future. I really needed – I was desperate for – some help here.
Once again, I am going to take a detour from my series of messages on The Ten. This morning I want to talk to you about death. Now before everyone gets up and rushes to the door, this will not be a funeral message. Nor will it be one that is simply meant to tug at your heart strings or bring a tear to your eye. I am going to deal with some very serious issues today.
While I still do not have everything figured out, I feel that the Lord has spoken to me. I am also pleased to say that I have finally reached a place where I now have peace concerning the events of last September as well as the trials that have unfolded over the past twelve months. In this message, I will attempt to share with you what I believe the Lord has shared with me.
FIRST, THOUGH, I WANT TO SHARE WITH YOU A LITTLE BACKGROUND CONCERNING MYSELF. I THINK IT WILL HELP YOU UNDERSTAND WHERE I AM COMING FROM.
Death and I have always had our issues. As early as I can remember, I was phobic about death. I recall as a child being terrified of an ambulance or a fire truck. Cemeteries would send me over the edge. I can remember one of my parents – I think it was my dad — coming in to calm me in the middle of the night once when I could not sleep. I had seen a fire truck or something and it really traumatized me. I still remember what he said. The words helped for a night and a night only.
While my family suffered though the requisite number of deaths as I was growing up, I refused to go to any of the funerals – except for one. I did go to my grandmother’s funeral when I was 17 but I left during the service. Again, I would not go to the cemetery. “Pastor, you needed help”. I know it. However, my family was to poor for any of us to visit a counselor. Besides, I was a guy, and guys… well you know.
I did not need to attend another funeral until I was a pastor. I know that some of you have heard this story before. If so, please bear with me. I had only been a pastor a few months when a fellow by the name of John Freeman was in an automobile accident. He had been drinking and driving. He would die within a few days. Just prior to his death, I prayed with the man in his hospital room. As a result of that brief encounter, the family asked me to conduct the man’s funeral. What was I to do? As a pastor was I to tell the people:
- “I am sorry, but I have this weird phobia about the dead?
- That I haven’t been to a complete funeral in my life?
- That I do not have a clue?”
No, of course I couldn’t tell them any of those things. Rather, I found a newspaper and turned to the obituaries. Two teenage girls in an nearby town had been killed in another auto accident. I grabbed a spiral notebook and went to the funeral. I found a place on the back row – true story – and sat there and took notes.
When it came time for Mr. Freeman’s service, I confessed to the funeral director my issues and asked him for help. Together we walked through the experience. As I like to say, it must have worked. Mr. Freeman is still in his grave today. He never came back to haunt me!
Since that day in June, 1971, I have conducted numerous funerals. In fact, I have conducted or helped conduct an even 60 funerals since I have served New Life.
While I certainly have gotten over my phobia of death, I do nonetheless find it interesting that after all these years, and after maybe hundreds of funerals, I find myself again struggling with death.
Please notice… THE PREVALENCE OF DEATH
Death – the cessation of life – surrounds us. It is indeed a major theme of movies, books, music, and even video games. It is in nature. It is in Scripture. It marks our history. In fact, it is hard to find someplace, some thing where death isn’t.
Earlier in this message I alluded to Hebrews 9:27. I want to read it again, this time, though, I will read it from the Today’s English Version, “Everyone must die once, and after that be judged by God.” Oh, how we’d like to change that verse; just a word or two would suffice:
- “Nearly everyone must die . . .” or
- “Everyone but me must die . . .” or
- “Everyone who forgets to eat right and take vitamins must die . . .”
But those are not God’s words. In his plan everyone must die, yes, even those who eat
right and take their vitamins.
Death is, simply put, a fact of life. According to the CIA World Factbook, dated July, 2005, the world’s death rate was approximately 9 deaths per 1,000 people a year. That works out to roughly 56,600,000 deaths a year or about a 155,000 a day. Of those numbers, some 2.4 million Americans die each year.
Euripides wrote, “No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow.” Along that line, I have preached or assisted in 11 funerals down through the years for people aged 25 or younger. George Bernard Shaw once observed, “The statistics on death are impressive. One out of one dies.”
I want to now show you a chart taken from ItsMyLife.com. The chart deals with how people die. You can see from the chart that people die at home, at the hospital, in the water, on the road, at places where they should be and in places where they shouldn’t be. I find it interesting that approximately 40% of all deaths are sudden deaths. Or to put it another way, 2,600 Americans woke up yesterday who did not wake up today.
THE BIBLE DOES NOT SHY AWAY FROM THE FACT OF THE DEATH OF THE RIGHTEOUS
The word death is found 1315 times in the King James Version of the Bible, some 451 times in the New Testament alone.
Some of the most lovely passages in the whole of the Bible deal with this topic:
- Psalm 23:4 certainly comes to mind, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
- 1 Corinthians 15 is called the great resurrection chapter.
- John 14 begins with these familiar words, “Do not let your hearts be
- troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms;
- if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”
- John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
- Psalm 116:15 states, “Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.”
Then the stories of the deaths of the great saints also take up no small amount of space in Scripture. The deaths of Moses, Jacob, David, John the Baptist, the events leading up to the death of the Apostle Paul and of course the summit of all of the Bible is the death of Jesus. It is detailed in both the Old and New Testament.
I do want to share with you some of the details of one of the most famous deaths in the New Testament – the death of Jesus’ friend Lazarus. The account is found in John 11. One of my former youth pastors used this chapter as the bases for a sermon better than twenty years ago as he preached the funeral for a 18 year old girl from our church who was killed by a drunk driver. Anyway, that sermon was one of the greatest funeral messages I have ever heard in my life. I will never forget it.
The chapter centers around a line found in verse 14. Jesus says, “Lazarus is dead.” For most of us, that is it. There is nothing else to say. We silently turn, hug those who are with us, cry, and walk out the door. The worst has happened. In our modern world, the nurse can go home. The physician can return to his office. Medicines, IV.’s, oxygen and ministering hands are no longer needed. “Lazarus is dead.”
There are 45 verses in this chapter. There are nearly that many “why” questions that could be asked here as well.
- Jesus knew that His friend was deathly ill. Why did He purposefully delay paying a visit?
- Jesus could have easily sent His Word and healed the fellow. Why didn’t He?
- Then there is the issue of love. “Martha said to Jesus, ‘if you had been here, my brother would not have died.’” The inference was, this was the Lord’s fault. “If you really loved Him….” And yet, Love was not the issue. Verse 36 records, “Then the Jews said, ‘See how he loved him!’”
- Why was this tragedy allowed in the first place?
- Why did the Lord’s friend have to suffer?
- Wasn’t Lazarus too young to die?
- Wasn’t Lazarus too good a man to die? Wouldn’t his friendship with Jesus protect him?
- Jesus also loved the two sisters. Why were they required to have to walk though this valley?
I also want to point out that:
- It is in this chapter that we read, “Jesus wept.”
- It is here that we find the promise, “‘I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?’” (John 11:25-26).
- And it is also here that we find the words captured in John 11:38-44, “Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. ‘Take away the stone,’ he said. ‘But, Lord,’ said Martha, the sister of the dead man, ‘by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.’ Then Jesus said, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?’
So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, ‘Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.’ When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, ‘Lazarus, come out!’
The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, ‘Take off the grave clothes and let him go.’”
Lazarus didn’t need those garments of death any longer. He who had been dead was now alive!
The story ends with the mourners leaving. They had nothing to weep over anymore.
Jesus had performed the outstanding sign of His ministry! He had also dried their tears.
Revelation 7:17 promises: “For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.” Revelation 21:4 adds: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Jesus majors in wiping tears away. He always has, He always will.
I want to now direct your attention to another passage that deals with death – Hebrews 11. What do you think of when you consider the contents of Hebrews 11? Faith? Right! Hebrews 11 is known as Faith’s Hall of Fame. It lists some 16 people directly and numerous others indirectly who were commended for their feats of faith. These individuals manifested faith – great faith — in nearly every conceivable circumstance. They believed for healing, for protection, for children, they believed in times of war or terrible evil. They truly believed God and His Word.
And yet as great as each of these people were in faith, verse 13 in the King James Version notes: “These all died….” In fact, while the word faith can be found 23 times in this chapter, the word death or its equivalent can be found some 12 times plus numerous other references can be found relating to the ways in which these champions of faith passed away.
The point is, this chapter is not only about faith, it is also about dying in faith! Abraham is listed here as is Moses. King David’s name is listed here as is Noah. Yet, regardless of their greatness or level of faith, “These all died.” You see, in spite of what some folks would have you believe, faith does not do away with the reality of death.
Listen to Hebrews 11:13. I will read a portion of the passage from a number of translations:
- “All these people were still living by faith when they died.”
- “All these great people died in faith.”
- “Every one of those people died. But they still had faith….”
- “All these came to their end in faith….”
- “All these died in the possession of faith.”
These folks not only had faith to live, they also had faith to die.
- They not only believed that they could be healed here, they also were content with the knowledge that sometimes the Lord delays healing the physical body until one second after death has done its job.
- They not only had faith that God could and would, but they simply left the how’s and the wherefores up to Him.
Did they have faith? The Bible says they did; they had faith enough to carry them though death!
Now I want to return to the issues that I alluded to at the outset of this message. I will do so by sharing with you THREE ANSWERS that I believe that I have received from our gracious Lord. Three answers that have only crystallized in my mind within the last week. Three answers that showed me, I was wrong.
1. I WANTED TO BE IN CONTROL
I do not consider myself a control freak. However, I was trying to control that which was not mine to control. I was trying to play God. I wanted to dictate who should die and when.
A. W. Pink in his classic The Sovereignty of God observes in the Foreword To The First Edition that “From every pulpit in the land it needs to be thundered forth that God still lives, that God still observes, that God still reigns. … What is needed now, as never before, is a full, positive, constructive setting forth of the Godhood of God.”
Pink who became a Christian at the age of 22 in the year 1908 then goes on to note: “Without a doubt a world-crisis is at hand, and everywhere men are alarmed. But God is not! He is never taken by surprise. It is no unexpected emergency which now
confronts Him, for He is the One who “worketh all things after the counsel of His own
will” (Ephesians 1:11). Hence, though the world is panic-stricken, the word to the
believer is, “Fear not!” “All things” are subject to His immediate control: “all things” are moving in accord with His eternal purpose, and therefore “all things” are “working together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” It must be so, for “of Him, and through Him, and to Him are all things” (Romans 11:36).”
Peter had some control issues too. He too was rebuked. Then I also think that control was what was behind Job’s trial. As a result, he was also rebuked. Listen to Job 38:2 from several versions:
- Contemporary English Version, “Why do you talk so much when you know so little?”
- New Living Translation, “Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words?”
- The Message, “Why do you confuse the issue? Why do you talk without knowing what you’re talking about?”
- The Living Bible, “Why are you using your ignorance to deny my providence?”
- The NIV simply says, “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge?”
I want you to notice, the Lord didn’t question Job’s integrity or sincerity. Those things were never an issue. The real question was, who was going to call the shots? God or Job?
Friends, God is not a Sunday morning plaything. Nor is He here to merely rubber stamp our every whim. He is the great sovereign God; the Creator of the universe. As such, He demands servitude. He demands humility in His presence. He demands that He be recognized as the One who is seated on the throne as Lord and God. Not me; not you.
In short, I wanted to be in control of life and death – as hard as that is to admit. I was wrong.
2. I WAS STUCK IN THE VALLEY
I will let this short illustration explain what I mean here: A pastor had a three-year-old daughter who died several years ago. The brother continued to struggle with the girl’s death for some time. Finally the Lord gave him one word that made all the difference in his grief. It was the word “through.”
The pastor said, “One day I was reading the 23rd Psalm and I read these words, “Even though I walk THROUGH the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” I looked at that word ‘through’ and realized that I had gotten stuck in the valley. God was there to walk with me as I passed on through the valley.”
Like this other pastor, I too had become stuck. I was having a hard time moving forward.
Now if you have experienced the death of a close loved one or friend, please under-stand, “Part of get¬ting over it is knowing that you will never get over it.” There will always be that empty spot.
But pastor, how long will it be before I begin to feel “normal” again? That is a hard question. To be sure, it is impossible to fit everyone into one tight little timeframe. Within reason, any length of time is normal. If I were pressed to come up with a time frame, I would say that a rough estimate would be a year or two.
One woman said she knew the worst was over when she was able to take the car to the mechanic without even thinking that this was a job her husband would have done.
Regardless, I was stuck. My questions had a stranglehold on me.
The Lord reminded me, though, that the valley of death is meant to be a thoroughfare, not a box canyon. We are meant to go through it; not set up shop there.
The irony of it all is, our friends and loved ones who have passed on do not get stuck in death’s valley. The Apostle Paul noted that 2 Corinthians 5:8 (New Century Version), “… We really want to be away from this body and be at home with the Lord.” The righteous dead are home with Christ.
The only ones who get stuck in the valley of death, are those of us who are left behind. That was me. I was wrong.
3. I DIDN’T FULLY UNDERSTAND THE DEATH OF THE RIGHTEOUS
For whatever reason, I had come to allow the world’s view of death to influence me. Death was something to be avoided at all costs. Death was loss. Death was yuck!
Recently, though, the Lord reminded me of the deaths of the righteous in Scripture. Those were good deaths; gentle deaths.
- Jesus didn’t go kicking and screaming to the Cross.
- Stephen didn’t lash out at God as he was being stoned to death.
- The Apostle Paul simply said, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” 2 Timothy 4:7. He was beheaded.
This past week I finished reading the outstanding book Bonhoeffer. The book is a New York Times bestseller. It is the biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Dietrich Bonhoefer was a German Lutheran pastor, theologian and martyr. He was a participant in the German resistance movement against Nazism. His involvement in plans by members of the German Military Intelligence Office to assassinate Adolf Hitler resulted in his arrest in April 1943 and his subsequent execution by hanging in April 1945, 23 days before the Nazis’ surrender. The Nazi’s hung him by using a piece of piano wire.
This book had a profound influence on my view of as well as understanding of death.
In many conversations Bonhoeffer remarked that to reach the age of 36 or 37 was quite enough for a Christian. He died at the age of 39.
Here is a snippet from the book: “Even if millions have seen Bonhoeffer’s death as tragic and as a prematurely ended life, we can be certain that he did not see it that way at all. In a sermon he preached while a pastor in London, he said: No one has yet believed in God and the kingdom of God, no one has yet heard about the realm of the resurrected, and not been homesick from that hour, waiting and looking forward joyfully to being released from bodily existence.
Whether we are young or old makes no difference. What are twenty or thirty or fifty years in the sight of God? And which of us knows how near he or she may already be to the goal? That life only really begins when it ends here on earth, that all that is here is only the prologue before the curtain goes up—that is for young and old alike to think about.
Why are we so afraid when we think about death? Death is only dreadful for those who live in dread and fear of it. Death is not wild and terrible, if only we can be still and hold fast to God’s Word. Death is not bitter, if we have not become bitter ourselves. Death is grace, the greatest gift of grace that God gives to people who believe in him. Death is mild, death is sweet and gentle; it beckons to us with heavenly power, if only we realize that it is the gateway to our homeland, the tabernacle of joy, the everlasting kingdom of peace.
How do we know that dying is so dreadful? Who knows whether, in our human fear and anguish we are only shivering and shuddering at the most glorious, heavenly, blessed event in the world?
Death is hell and night and cold, if it is not transformed by our faith. But that is just what is so marvelous, that we can transform.”
Another portion from the book: “On the morning of his death, Bonhoeffer could be seen kneeling on the floor praying fervently. He had hardly finished his last prayer when the door opened and two evil-looking men in civilian clothes came in and said: “Prisoner Bonhoeffer. Get ready to come with us.” Those words “Come with us”—for all prisoners they had come to mean one thing only—the scaffold. In the words of a witness, “We bade him good-bye. He drew me aside, “This is the end,” he said. “For me the beginning of life.”
Again quoting a eyewitness, “At the place of execution, he again said a short prayer and then climbed the steps to the gallows, brave and composed. His death ensued after a few seconds. In the almost fifty years that I worked as a doctor, I have hardly ever seen a man die so entirely submissive to the will of God.”
Is it therefore any wonder that Psalm 116:15 states, “Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.”
Hebrews 11:40 notes that “God had planned something better….” When a saint of the Lord dies he or she immediately receives:
- A better home,
- A better body,
- A better future,
- A better job,
- A better country,
- A better church,
- A better climate,
- A better everything!
On top of this, he or she sees Jesus as well as other friends and loved ones who have preceded the person in death.
In my ignorance, I failed to fully understand the death of the righteous.
- I failed to see the loving arms of God wrapped around Robin and Laurie.
- I failed to understand that the Lord wanted them there even more than we wanted them here.
- I failed to understand that their battles with cancer and other issues were finally – once and for all – over!
I simply failed to understand the beauty of the death of the righteous.
GOD was right, I was wrong.
